2003-06-19 - 10:58 a.m.

When I Wake Up

An unanticipated difficulty with being awake and interested in life is that work, which has not changed much in the last six months in terms of difficulty except to get easier as I realized more of the fundamental truths of management, has started to inconsiderately abrade my nerves. The monotony and lack of intellectual stimulation, which I counted as bonuses when forcing myself into hibernation mode, are abruptly less positive things.

I imagine that I will adjust, but all the same I wish I knew how long this level of interest in life was going to last -- I know myself well enough to acknowledge that any attempt to radically alter my path in life will most likely die with my interest. Any adjustment to one's course requires constant attendence, or you're not navigating so much as drifting.

If it's all the same to everyone, I'd rather just stay where I am, rather than lose interest and fail midway if interest in life flags, dig? Cautiously optimistic doesn't begin to describe the last few days.

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