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2003-06-12 - 3:15 a.m. "In Enemy Territory" As periodically happens, I just deleted an immense entry and no trace of it remains. I find this to be very annoying, and am going to go and play Fallout 2 for awhile. In case anyone is interested, I discovered the answer to everything that is wrong with the world and codified it in five words, but it is now lost to the world forever because I pushed the wrong button. Life's a bitch like that. <-- hint hint Suffice it to say that I am surrounded by hostiles deep in enemy territory and can't stop grinning because all it means when you hit bottom is that you've got something to push off of, and I'm never as at home as when I've got something concrete to fight. Additionally I was thinking about apologies and how if you were to list out "Myself" "Everyone I've really cared about" and "Some random fling of mine" and write across from them, in mixed-up order, three generalized apologies, that they'd be very difficult to descramble. Much like that prior sentence. I will demonstrate. MYSELF <--> For diluting your memories. EVERYONE <--> For getting your hopes up. FLING <--> For not being honest with you. What I mean is that you can rearrange those apologies any way you like and they make exactly as much sense, even to me, and I'm the one presumably the one who knows my own life the best. I was thinking about what it might mean that all of our most general apologies can be to ourselves without any real adjustment, and gave up midway to accidentally delete the entry. That is pretty much where I was. Now I will go shoot stuff in the eyes in Fallout 2.
Addendum And remember to treasure, while it is still yours, the moments when you are all of someone's world that exists, and when they are all of yours. The seconds when you are too much to take in and they have to pull away from the feeling that they are going to be swallowed up and lost. Deep sighs of amazement. I miss those.
DLand |